Cards From the Bearded One

I've been sick all week. Not the wonderful kind of sick where you can't even go to work and you get to lay in bed and sleep and watch TV and have people take care of you and bring you food. No, the kind of sick where it feels like the terrorists planted a snot bomb in your head and set it for Monday morning.

But, not sick enough to stay home from work. It has to be pretty bad for that. Being a dentist, if I can't make it in, it really can inconvenience a LOT of people that have toothaches and took time off work and stuff to come see me. So I went and was miserable. Then I came home, ate and went to bed.

Of course I made sure to make time to catch Carston Charles face off against Clifton Phifer in a couple of performances that we...you know...COULD HAVE USED TWO FREAKIN' YEARS AGO!!!!

But I'm not mad. I'm not mad.

But that has nothing to do with this post. This post is about cards that I got from Beardy. I don't remember why I got them. But they are mine none-the-less.

Since my month long sabbatical, I'll be playing catch up for a while. So don't be surprised if something that you sent me in say...2005...makes it up on my blog.

Here is some kick ass stuff that Beardy sent along. Possibly because he felt bad for stealing my football team and using it to bludgeon the current farce in Brown and Orange.

Joe Carter 1985 Topps

I always liked Joe Carter. He was a very popular Indian in my youth. Then we traded him for a package including Sandy Alomar Jr, who was even more popular. I don't know how you characterize his time in Cleveland as anything but a success, and if you ask any Cleveland fan, they will tell you that they have fond memories of him.

As a kid, I remember thinking he was one of the greatest players of his era, maybe ever (I also thought that about Andre Thornton). And then I found the cult of Bill James and realized that it's kind of important not to make outs. Now I look at Joe more the way he really was. A good player who hit a great Home Run.

Not for the Indians, of course.


Joe Carter 1986 Topps

Another Joe card from the set that (somehow) started it all for me. I still often look at the 1986 design and just marvel. I'd really like to know exactly how in the hell something like that happened.


Grady Sizemore 2009 Topps Chrome

You may have heard that I'm a fan of Sizemore. I may have already told you about my run in with Grady. It's a fantastic story that happened in september, right after he was shut down for the season.

You're never going to believe this. I was walking out of Giant Eagle and he was walking in.

OK, I guess that's not such a great story.



OK OK, Time out. I have to tell you this. I had the WS game on and it ended a few minutes ago. The news came on and the lead story is about how the police found 2 decomposing bodies on the 3rd floor of a house on the east side. There was also a freshly dug grave in the basement. The bodies have apparently been there for about a month decomposing with the guy still living in the house.

One of the neighbors was interviewed, the wayt the news always does. JJ Jackson, neighbor, appears on camera wearing sunglasses (it's night). What does JJ have to say?

"It's not going to be a good Halloween"

Classic.

Oh yeah...That's a Casey Blake 2006 UD Epic

Travis Hafner 2009 A&G Relic

Love Travis Hafner. Watch out next year. Hafner will be healthy. He's going to team up with LaPorta to hit the crap out of the ball next year.

Seriously, watch out.

Bob Feller 2008 Tristar Signacuts Auto

Bob Feller was one of the greatest of all time. He was an ace pilot in WW2 and Korea. He'd just as soon kick you in the gut as look at you.

Bob Feller...Red Ass Extraordinaire.

Love the auto.

Thanks dude.

My Exquisite Cards

I Am Joe Collector had the exquisite case break a few weeks back. I figured it was about time to gloat over what I got. I usually get in on his breaks because it gets me a lot of cool stuff that I wouldn't usually buy on my own. You know...like Exquisite.

I think the high end prices are ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. Don't get me wrong, I understand the reasons why they cost that much. At least I understand from an elementary economic supply and demand type of view. But it's still ridiculous.

I don't want this to come off as a grumpy "high end is the devil" and "what about the poor children" kind of rant. I have nothing against high end and I'm glad it exists and I think it's good for the hobby. What I mean is that when I step back a little, I realize that I'm a grown man that considers it reasonable to spend around $200 for a pack of baseball cards with 5 cards in it.

That's not something that I would necessarily tell my friends at the bar. They wouldn't understand. They would think I've lost my marbles, and I'm not sure they would be wrong. That's why I say it's ridiculous.

That doesn't mean I don't want them. And when Stusigpi gives me a reasonable opportunity to get some, you better believe I'll be in on it.

I got 2 spots which got me 2 cards, and I won one of the base cards as well.

Vlad the Impaler base card.

Travis Hafner Auto 18/50

This is probably my favorite card, being a Tribe fan and all. I still have (probably unrealistic) hopes that he can pull out of his 3 year slide and re-emerge as one of the games preeminent sluggers.

And, he's from North Dakota so...Yahhh, Ohh Yahhh...You betcha.


Alexi Casilla/Don Kelly Dual Auto 20/35

I've heard of Alexi Casilla, and my initial reaction was a good one. However, Baseball reference has his similar batters as Jay Partridge and Arthur Irwin. Yeah, that dampens the enthusiasm a bit.

I haven't heard of Don Kelly. Now on his second go round with the Tigers, he's been released by the Pirates, Diamondbacks, and Tigers in the last few years. Not even a trade for a player to be named later or a gift certificate to Sizzler. Not encouraging. But, a very pretty card.

Miguel Montero Auto 15/20

Starting most of the Diamondbacks games at catcher this year, Miguel looks like he's in line for a pretty good, and possibly great, major league career. Nice pull on this one.


Chad Billingsley/Hong-Chih Kuo Dual Auto 6/10

I think this is a great pull. I like Billingsley. He's a hometown boy from right here in Ohio. I know he's not had a great year this year, but I think he's the real deal and is going to have a nice career. He was one of the names being thrown around, along with Kershaw, in the Cliff Lee sweepstakes this summer. I don't know exactly what the package was (or if it was just rumors). I know that what we got was a 19 year old fireballer who was on the disabled list at the time and just had shoulder surgery. So, yeah, I'd have preferred Chad.

Hong is a fixture in the Dodger's bullpen and as far as I can tell is pretty lights out.

Really nice card.

Great cards all around. 2 autos and 2 dual auto. All pretty low numbered. All look great. All cards that I wouldn't have gotten of my own accord (except maybe the Hafner if I ran across it on the Bay) out of a product that the idea of busting myself is some sort of future dream.

Thanks for the opportunity Jeff. Good times.

Check out the blog here (as if there's a chance you haven't been there before).

Get in on the group break action. It really is the best blog for group breaks and there's usually something either in the works or just around the corner.

Cards from Dubbs: Part 1

Dubbs over at Cheese and Beer sent me a package a short time ago. He also made me that handy dandy banner you see at the top of my blog. Dubbs takes good care of me. The only thing I can figure is that maybe he feels like he owes me after taking CC Sabathia away from me last season (Dubbs is a Brewers fan). Whatever the case, Dubbs kicks ass, and so do the cards he sent me.

I've been trying to make it a practice to do a thorough review whenever I get some cards from another blogger. That's why it takes me so damn long to get the reviews and the thank yous up. I apologize to all who have sent me stuff that I haven't reviewed yet and I hope this in no way deters anyone from sending me free cards that I don't deserve.

Here is part 1 of the review of the loot from Dubbs who is a good man, and thorough.




1. Cliff Lee - 2003 Donruss Champions

Clifton Phifer Lee. Can you believe that's his real name? I always thought he looked like Don Flamenco.

People think that Cliff came out of nowhere last year to win the Cy Young. He did, in a sense. He had a terrible 2007. A lot of people forget that Cliff went 18-5 in 2005 and finished 4th in the Cy Young. What I hope is that 2007 was the anomaly, not 2008. I guess we'll find out soon enough.

2. Grady Sizemore - 2008 Bowman Chrome

I love Grady Sizemore, and I love Chrome. Be it Topps or Bowman, Chrome are probably my favorite cards. Right now my Sizemore collection stands at about 60 different cards (Dave and Mario are safe for the foreseeable future) but I had yet to lay my hands on this card.

It's a good thing I have it now. As much as I like Sizemore, I wasn't aware of the full extent of his skills. Grady, it seems, "combines precise mechanics with bat speed and lightning hands". I shit you not. Lightning hands. It says it right there on the back of my card.




3. Mark Lewis - 1992 Topps

Mark Lewis was going to be awesome. He was the second pick of the 1988 draft. A local boy from Hamilton Ohio. As far as I remember, Mark Lewis was the most exciting rookie that the Indians had since Joe Charboneau. He was going to save the franchise.

And for a while, it seemed like he really might. Back then, we cared about Avg, Hrs, and RBIs. Probably in that order. There was nothing you loved more than to look up your teams stats in the Sporting News or the local paper and see .300 or higher next to a bunch of your guys names. Mark Lewis was called to duty at the beginning of 1991. In April, he mostly rode the bench but made the most of his opportunities. May rolled around and Mark Lewis would no longer be denied. He played 27 games. He hit .355. That's all that mattered. He was a force of nature. I put all of my hopes and dreams in the capable hands of Mark Lewis.

Then came June.

4. Luis Medina - 1989 Donruss

I have very little memory of Funky Cold Medina the player. I have very strong memories of Luis Medina the Rated Rookie. I couldn't tell you a single thing about him, but I could have described this card to you in detail even though I haven't looked at one closely in years.

Luis Medina was going to be a star. He may not be a force like Mark Lewis, but a star never the less. I know this because he was a Rated Rookie, and the greatest card ever produced also had the same honor bestowed upon it. Only a player worthy of such a great honor would be allowed admittance into the that exclusive club presided over by Jose Canseco. That is how I knew Luis Medina would be a star. In his entire career, Luis Medina hit .207 in 51 games.

I will not be too hard on myself. Nor do I blame Donruss for misleading me. It seems that everyone thought that Medina deserved to be in that club. Before the Indians drafted him in the 9th round of the 1985 draft, Medina was drafted by the Mets (twice), Yankees, Reds, As, and Astros. Inexplicably, he would never sign. I guess he was holding out for Cleveland. Who could blame him? Who wouldn't want to play in beautiful, sunny Cleveland?




5. Victor Martinez - 2007 SP Rookie Edition

Go out and buy a box of this product. Why? Because the cards are cool looking, there are a couple of nice little speed and power subsets, you'll get a few autos, and a box will only run you about $25. You really can't beat it.

Anyway, I really like this set. I can only assume that the boxes go for so cheap because I'm the only one on the face of the earth that does like it, I'm just a sucker for cheap cards. And look at that card. That is a cool fucking card.

The back tells us that Victor "came out blazing" in 2007. You know who came out blazing in 2009? Michael Phelps HEYOOOOOOO!

6. Victor Martinez - 2007 SPX

I'm pretty sure this is what they mean by die cut. I think this is a fantastic card. I don't know what the significance of the "X" is in these cards and this set.




7. Travis Hafner- 2005 Bowman

Travis continues to insist that his shoulder feels great and he has no problem now. I sure hope so. I love Hafner. Good Times in Cleveland whenever he gets going.

The back tells us what Hafner's skills are. One of them is "makes great contact, hitting the ball where it's pitched". Just once I want to hear about the player that hits the ball where it isn't pitched. You know, just to fake out the defense.

Also, apparently Hafner is "aggressive on the bases". With 7 stolen bases in 7 seasons it's sure hard to argue that point. When I think of Hafner that's the first thing that pops into my head.

8. Travis Hafner - 2007 Upper Deck Elements

See, there he is, wreaking total havoc on the base paths. I have it on good authority that before the 2007 division series, Joe Torre told the Yankees that if they lost that series, it wasn't going to be because of Hafner's baserunning, by God. They were going to shut him down when he got on base. As it turns out, they did shut down Hafner. Not a single Stolen Base by him in the series. The Tribe somehow managed to defeat the Yankees anyway. But, it took an act of God (or possibly Jame Gumb). It sure as hell wasn't because Torre ignored Hafner on the Base paths




9. Colin Charland - 1992 Skybox

Who the hell is Colin Charland? I have no idea. Never heard of him before this card. It's a wonder he never did seem to pan out. Starting in 1986 he progressed steadily from A to A to A to A, until in 1989 he was promoted to AAA. He went 5-10 with a 5.49 ERA. No trace of him in 1990. He must have been selling used cars or something. Then back to A in 1991.

He seems like the perfect kind of player to stick on a baseball card and call him a pre-rookie.

10. Reggie Jefferson - 1992 Donruss

By 1992, the mystique of the rated rookie had worn off somewhat. I never had too much riding on the success of Reginold Jirod Jefferson. The most interesting thing on this card is on the back. It says :

How Acquired: Trade from Reds 6/14/91 for 1B Tim Costo.

OK, nothing strange about that. I even remember Tim Costo. Then under the Career Highlights, the first thing it says is "wound up with the Indians in June of '91 due to a clerical error by the Reds"

What? Say that again. A clerical error? Can you believe that this isn't expounded upon or explained further? Baseball reference has nothing. I have no idea what this means. Maybe it means they meant to trade someone else but they filed the wrong paperwork. They said "Ah fuck it. Keep him. We're not doing all that paperwork over"

Reggie had some good years in the majors. His biggest accomplishment in Cleveland was being part of the deal that brought us Omar Vizquel. For that, I will always love Reggie.

OK, that's enough for now. Be back with more from Dubbs, somewhere down the line.

Thanks again Dubbs.

Cards from Connor

These cards are part of a thank you package from Connor at Treasure Never Buried for his birthday gift. I sent him a smorgasbord (don’t you just love that word?) of packs of cards and he sent me these awesome cards in return. It looked like he had a great birthday. I know I really am enjoying my cards. Here’s what I got:

First is this hand signed, personalized note. Judging by all of the Indians stickers and all of the shininess, Connor really knows what I like!

4 Allen and Ginter Mini cards.
Travis Hafner 2007
Fausto Carmona 2008
Masahide Kobayashi 2008 Mini and Mini Black

I love the Allen and Ginter cards. I’ve been contemplating putting together a set of the. Getting these cards may make that decision a little easier for me. Maybe I’ll try a set of all Black Parallels. I think that would be pretty cool

Paul Sorrento 1993 Leaf

I like these Leaf cards. The backs feature the player over some sort of majestic landscape. Paul is superimposed over the majestic city of Cleveland and it’s Terminal Tower. Of course I didn’t scan the back. That would have involved forethought and planning.

Hafner 2008 A+G State of North Dakota

Apparently the Allen and Ginter set included all of the states and players from that state. It’s a pretty cool idea. I wonder who made the cut from Ohio? I think Hafner is a great choice to represent North Dakota. I know I’d be proud to have him. Then again, when it comes to North Dakota, the pickin’s are probably pretty slim.

Julian Tavarez 1994 Pinnacle

One thing I’ve noticed about Pinnacle and this set in particular is the photography is great. That’s usually a good thing. I’m not sure it is with Julian. Don’t get me wrong, this is a great action shot. It’s just that Julian has…how can I put this…an unfortunate countenance.

I’m not much for research. If I don’t know something, I usually just make it up. I try to let you know when I’m doing this. Unfortunately, this leads me to write things that are less than accurate. For example, it wasn’t too long ago that I referred to Brad Komminsk (on this very blog) as a “decent player”. Oh well, Reggie Jackson don’t hit a home run every time, right?

I bring this up because I’d like to find out if Tavarez ever faced off against Otis Nixon. I have no idea if this ever happened, but my contention is, if it did there was probably some sort of eclipse or earthquake that day. The amount of ugly involved in that matchup would be nothing short of biblical. Since I don’t know where to go to find out if this happened, I’m just going to assume that it did. So, basically:

Remember when Julian Tavarez faced Otis Nixon? The ground shook and they sky turned to black. Yes, God was angry that day, my friends.

Travis Hafner – 2008 Star Quest
2008 Upper Deck
2006 Upper Deck Future Stars

I love Hafner. What I don’t understand here, is how he ends up in a Future Stars set in 2006, his fifth year in the league. In 2005, before this card was printed, he ended up fifth in the MVP voting. Future Star? I guess. Hafner had another great season in 2006 and he’s been on the decline ever since. I think 2009 is his comeback year.

Grady Sizemore – 2007 Ultra
2007 Topps Updates and Highlights
2006 Upper Deck Future Stars

I think you all know how I feel about Sizemore. The Ultra is awesome. I never saw an Ultra set I didn’t like

Another Future Stars. These cards are great too look at. They are shiny and thick. I have no evidence that they have ever caused a seizure, then again I have no evidence to the contrary, so once again, I’m going to assume that they have. Don’t worry, as long as you don’t stare at them too long you’re in no immediate danger.

I also like the fact that Sizemore became a Future Star a year after getting 185 hits, 22HR, 22SB and appearing in 158 games. Look for Evan Longoria, Ryan Braun, and Albert Pujols in the 2009 Future Stars set. Actually, this set has an awesome checklist and I may add it to the sets that I’d like to put together. At the very least I think I’ll keep my eyes open for a box to break!

Daffy Duck – 1990 Upper Deck

I’m not sure if this is part of the regular set or if it is some separate Looney Tunes set. How Daffy became a Mariner, I’m not sure. There is nothing on Baseball Reference about that transaction. The card is great and I’d like to see more of what’s out there. I love all of the Looney Tunes characters. I’m glad to see JV bringing the love for these characters to a new generation.

Masa Kobayashi – 2008 Topps Chrome Auto

This is AWESOME! I love any auto, especially one of my Indians. And this happens to be in my favorite set from last year. Kobayashi had 2 seasons. The first half of the year he was great, even doing some closing. The 2nd half he wasn’t as good. I think he just started to wear down. Next year, Wedge will know how to handle him better and I think he’s going to be one of the better guys in our bullpen.

Thank you again Connor for the great Indians cards. I hope you had a great Birthday, are having a great Thanksgiving, and will have a great Christmas!

Now, go get that turkey!

Tribecards Cards: Part 1

A while back David over at Tribecards sent me a package. It was for the scratch off contest and a trivia question I answered correctly. What I didn’t expect was around 100 baseball cards of various Indians players. Well I’m finally getting around to putting a thank you up on the old blog here. In my defense I have been fairly busy with the new kid and all, and I didn’t want to just post a few thoughts in a few minutes and call it a day. The cards deserve better than that. I tried to narrow it down to about 8 – 10 of my favorites, but there are just too many and I couldn’t. So, basically, I’m going to post these up there in about 3 installments.

What follows is just some of my usual, long winded ramblings on things, often not having very much to do with the cards at all. What can I say. I’m very strange, as it turns out, and I’ve decided I’m getting too old and tired to fight it. If a lot of this doesn’t make any sense to you, don’t worry, it doesn’t make much sense to me either.

So here they are. My hard earned cards from Tribecards. They are spectacular. I apologize in advance for my inevitable failed attempt to do them justice.

1. Jim Thome – 2008 Topps Moments and Milestones 125/150

This card commemorates Thome entering the 500 HR club. I’m not sure what 22 on the front means. I guess maybe it means that he is 22nd on the HR list, or possibly this card shows him getting his 22nd homer. That would explain why he is in a Tribe uniform on the front. Anyway, it’s a sweet card. 125/150. I still get excited about any numbered card. And, since it’s the ONLY 125/150 it can safely (according to the Ebay rules, unless I’m misinterpreting them) be considered a 1/1. Kick ass.

2. David Kelton – 2004 Bowman Futures Game Gear

This is the card that I got for answering a trivia question during the contest. In an incredible display of brainpower seldom seen outside the oval office, I was able to name the Indians players with 3000 hits. I would, at this time, like to clarify that I did this WITHOUT looking it up on baseball reference. I think it’s important that you know these things. David Kelton, as far as I can tell is out of baseball after amassing an incredible OPS+ of -8. I’m not exactly sure, but I’m going to say that this means I have had a more successful big league career than David Kelton as my career OPS+ is 0. David did have 3 more hits than me though.

3. Masato Yoshii – 201 Pacific Authentic Game Worn Jersey

I’ll start by saying that I can’t remember seeing a Pacific card that I didn’t like. This is a really great looking card. Yoshii broke into the league with the Mets in 1998 at the age of 33. He pitched for 5 years, even winning 12 games in 1999. He pocketed over $6 mil. Not too shabby for a guy I’d never heard of.

4. Travis Hafner – 2007 Topps Finest

I love Finest. They’re so damn shiney. Probably more than any other player, I’m pulling for Hafner next year to regain some of his old magic. It hasn’t been too long since he would go on these incredible streaks for a week or two where every time he stepped to the plate you expected him to absolutely murder the ball. It’s an incredible feeling for a fan and Hafner gave it too me more than any other player. But not recently. I want that feeling again. Hafner deserves it and Cleveland deserves it. Damn it, I deserve it.

5. Omar Vizquel – 2004 Fleer Inscribed

I may have already written about it but that won’t stop me now. I love Vizquel. Clevelanders will fight to the death anyone who dares utter that omar isn’t the best defensive shortstop EVER. (We’re kind of like Cincinattians and Skyline chili that way. The only difference is Vizquel is good. Skyline is shit on a hot dog.) I know there are stats and metrics (which I am a big believer in) that suggest that Omar really wasn’t all that great. Those stats didn’t watch him play every day for a decade from seats in Jacobs Field of in front of our TVs.
It reminds me of a joke I heard on Weekend Update a long time ago. I think it was David Spade. I’ll paraphrase how it went because I don’t remember it exactly. It was the mid 90s and Jacob Dylan had improbably and temporarily surpassed, for the briefest of moments, the popularity of his genius father with the Wallflower’s hit song “One Headlight”. Not long after this it was discovered that Bob had been “banging” Cheryl Tiegs (to use to parlance of our time), star of a generation of male adolescent fantasy. So the joke went like this: “While Jacob may be a popular rock star, Daddy’s an artist.” Well, that’s how Cleveland feels about Omar. Ozzie Smith et al. may be great shortstops, but Omar’s an artist.

6. Chris Bando – 1985 Topps

I always thought that Bando was good. Why? He was on the Indians. I’m not sure if I knew about the tremendous unibrow or if it would have changed my opinion one way or the other.
The back of the card states that “Chris enjoys golf, aerobics, and reading the Bible”. At this point I’m 43.72% sure that they just make this shit up. Or, maybe the athletes say these things to screw with people and have a good laugh when the cards come out. Seriously, aerobics? Is there any chance that aerobics is in the top 3 things that Chris Bando enjoys? Maybe it happened like this:

Phone rings in the clubhouse. Ernie Camacho answers.

Ernie Camacho: Yeah?

Artimus McGuillicutty: Hello, this is Artimus McGuillicutty from Topps. Could I speak to Chris Bando please?

EC: Sure, this is Chris. How can I help you Mr. McGuillicutty?
AM: Oh, call me Art please. Mr. McGuillicutty is my father. HaHaHaHaHa.
EC: Sure thing Art. What can I do you for?
AM: Well Chris, I’m calling because…
EC: Mr Bando.
AM: Excuse me?
EC: Call me Mr. Bando.
AM: Oh yes, of course, sorry. The reason I’m calling…ah…Mr. Bando…um…we’re…
EC: Sir.
AM: Huh?
EC: Call me sir goddamn it!
AM: Oh…I’m terribly sorry Mr. Bando sir.
EC: That’s better. Now, what the hell do you want Art?
AM: Yes…well…as I was saying, Mr. Bando, sir…I work for Topps, and …
EC: Spit it out Art. I haven’t got all day. If you haven’t noticed, I’m a very busy man. I’m a big league ballplayer. I’m a big deal so stop wasting my time Art.
AM: OK Mr. Bando sir. I’d like to know a few things that you enjoy so we can…
EC: Say, Art, have you ever heard that poem?
AM: Huh?
EC: You know, that poem that Bobcat Goldthwait tells in that Police Academy movie?
AM: The Police Acad…
EC: Yeah sure, Police Academy. Funny friggin’ movie. That Guttenberg guy is going to be a star.
AM: I’m not sure I follow …
EC: Well Bobcat tells this poem. Goes like this:
Gene Gene made a machine
Joe Joe made it go
Art Art blew a fart and blew the whole damn thing apart
Is that you Art? Did you fart on Gene’s machine?
AM: Look Mr. Bando, maybe I should…
EC: Sir.
AM: Huh?
EC: Call me sir. Look Art, we’ve already been over this. I’m a big deal remember? I’m not sure why I’m wasting my time if you aren’t going to pay attention.
AM: Maybe there would be a better time to…uh…reach you…uh…
EC: What’s wrong with now?
AM: Now? Oh…uh…It’s just…
EC: Will you get to the damn point Art?
AM: We’d like to know a few things you enjoy for the back of your baseball card.
EC: Oh…OK. I like getting drunk, getting laid and putting one in Balboni’s ear when he steps to the plate. That man’s a major asshole.
AM: Mr. Bando sir, we can’t put that on a baseball card.
EC: Why not?
AM: Well because we just can’t. We sell those things to kids.’
EC: OK OK. You’re a real drag Art, you know that? OK, just say golf and Creadence Clearwater Revival.
AM: Did you say golf and reading the Bible?
EC: Yeah.
AM: OK, we just need one more thing.
EC: Jesus Art, you’re relentless. How about aerobics.
AM: Aerobics? Really?
EC: Hell yeah. I’m a regular aerobics fiend. I’ve got all the jazzercise tapes with Richard Simmons. It’s how I warm up.
AM: Sure thing. Thanks a lot Mr. Bando.
EC: You’re kind of a jerk, Art.
AM: Have a terrific day.
-----------------------------
Chris Bando walks in from the shower.

CB: Who was that?
EC: Nobody.
CB: OK, just let me know if anyone calls. I’m expecting a call from Topps. I’ve got some things that they can put on my card this year that will make me look really cool.
EC: Sure thing boss.

Brett Butler laughs his ass off.

And…..scene.

Whew…I was beginning to doubt that I was going to bring that one around. I was just as excited as you guys to find out where that one was going.

What was I talking about?

Oh yeah. Baseball cards.

7. Jake Westbrook – 2006 Topps Turkey Red

I freakin’ love Turkey Red. I like Masterpieces too, but Turkey Red really…I don’t know…does it for me. Says here that Jake pitched 6 no hitters in high school. Not bad. On a similar note, John Perusek threw 2 no hitters his senior year – both against the same team. He was a hell of an athlete. I believe he played football at Mount Union from ’92-’96. If you haven’t heard of them, look ‘em up. They’ve been mildly successful.

Well, there it is. The overlong and ridiculously nonsensical first installment of The cards that Indians Baseball Cards Always sent me for doing nothing more than losing a scratch off contest. It seems like the less I do, the more good things come to me. It's about time, to tell you the truth. I've been faithfully following that creed my whole life and it looks like it's starting to pay off.

Thanks David

More to come.

Mark It Zero Smokey

HAS THE WHOLE WORLD GONE CRAZY!? AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO GIVES A SHIT ABOUT THE RULES!?


While trolling around ebay looking for game used and autos of Indians players I ran across one of Gellman's favorite kinds of sellers. It's the first time that an auction I was interested in was advertising a 1/1 when it clearly was not. I decided to fire off a question to the seller to see what his justification would be. Here is that exchange. (My misspelling included in the interest of full disclosure)


Me: "This item is no more a 1/1 than a 7/9 would be. Why is it advertized as a 1/1 in the description?"


Seller: "I DIDN'T MAKE THE RULES, THAT THE WAY CARDS THAT ARE THE FIRST ONE MADE,OR THE LAST ONE MADE ARE CONSIDERED. FOR SOME REASON THESE TWO CARDS ARE MORE SOUGHT AFTER. M.C.M."

So there you have it. We can all stop complaining about sellers calling cards 1/1 when they are not. IT'S THE RULES!

MARK IT 1/1 GELLMAN!